Angeline

Kelvin

lowhw@mbox3.singnet.com.sg — Wed, 22 Aug 2001 11:52:10 GMT

I just got to know this net friend called Kelvin online and we got along quite well. He's a sweet and nice guy and i like him. but i learnt not to trust people easily from my past experience.
Though i would like to get to know him more, but i tend to be very defensive over myself. i am afraid that he might cheat me, of my trust or even feelings.
I asked my friend Szeling who stays near him to help me check things out. In the end she realised that the address he gave me was actually this very big and nice house. She seemed to be attracted by him, by his background and everything etc.
This afternoon Kelvin messaged me, 'i am very annoying rite? keep msging you' and i was just trying to spike him and reply 'yah if thats wat you think then why you keep msging me?'
He did not reply after that even when i send him a message to apolognise.
However, when i asked Szeling to call him, for some stupid reasons, Szeling pretended to make the wrong call. And Kelvin actually messaged Szeling after that saying that she has a nice voice and wanted to make friends with her.
When Szeling called and told me that, i sort of felt disappointed with Kelvin thinking that he's just a bloody flirt. And i can tell from Szeling's voice that she wanted to know him, but what's stopping her is that she is afraid that i might be angry.
However, after much thinking, i told her to just go ahead and befriend him. Though i did not feel good, but well there's nothing wrong.
Anyway Szeling seemed to enjoy talking to him though they knew each other for less than an hour. They are meeting up later... so... shall see what happens then.

Kelvin

lowhw@mbox3.singnet.com.sg — Wed, 22 Aug 2001 11:51:03 GMT

lowhw@mbox3.singnet.com.sg — Sat, 31 Mar 2001 02:56:23 GMT

sometimes i wonder if i should ever write down all my thoughts and feelings here. no matter what, this is still some internet thingy and anyone with my address can read all my personal thoughts.
but well...i am just hoping that maybe i can share my problems with someone whom i dunno in real life. only in this way, i can face people with my true self and not putting a mask on.
sometimes it's really very tiring to behave like someone you know you are not. but in a certain situation, you have to, whether you like it or not. i guess it's just the rules of life, in order to survive, you have to learn to adapt to the environment. be someone people want you to be, to change for people's sake, but not your own. isnt't is miserable? or i am just being a sadist? but it's really very tiring... at least for me.

lowhw@mbox3.singnet.com.sg — Thu, 29 Mar 2001 13:32:49 GMT

I went to Yishun SAFRA to support our school bowling team today. Because of this, i missed lessons for 3 days. Actually, i was forced to go support the team by our 'dearest' teacher in charge Mrs Gabriel. I find it extremely ridiculous, to be forced to give support to people. I am facing difficulties in my school work and i think it will be more appropriate to spend time in school then to attend such events. I am not trying to say that it is a waste of time to give our friends some support but we already dont have much time for ourselves in our school work, why should we spare our precious time just to shout and 'encourage' people? Doesnt it already defeated the purpose of 'giving friends support' when you did not do it willingly? They call it team spirit... so are we suppose to fail our O level papers because of team spirit? Will it be easier for us to get a job if we once had team spirit just by shouting and encouraging people? Think about it Mrs Gabriel!